Cambodia: Day 3

During our third full day in Cambodia, we woke up early enough that I was able to catch Steve Nash nonchalantly dribble through a series of staggered mannequin defenders and deliver a one handed bounce pass into a netted target. This was NBA All-Star weekend, and I was happy to catch a few minutes of basketball, no matter how arbitrary the competition. Watching him maneuver effortlessly through the obstacle course got me thinking about my brief encounter with the two-time MVP- my only real celebrity encounter (conversely, seeing Derron Williams got me thinking about how much product the dude must lather onto his his lid. Have you seen his hair? It seriously looks like someone poured motor oil on a freshly cropped poodle).

This was 2007 at the height of Nash's popularity. I was in Phoenix for a work conference and decided to stay the weekend to visit my college buddy Greg, take in a Diamondbacks game and eat a ton of great Mexican food. I love Mexican food. Unfortunately, the few friends and family who know me extremely well (along with people next to me in an elevator or long flight) are aware of my penchant for horrendous bouts of flatulence. Obviously, Mexican food exacerbates this personal problem.

All of my dormmates in college shared a special bond over music, sports, movies etc., but our shining legacy will always be the smell that still permeates those walls nearly a decade later. We were all firm believers in the theory that if you never lifted your leg and pushed a dirty fart in the direction of one of your friends, how good of a friends can you really be?

We lived on the first floor without windows on either side. While the other three floor could air out their hallway, we had no such luxury. The end result was a mixture of ass, balls, feet, puke and protein powder. Basically, it smelled like John Wayne Gacy's crawlspace.

So, given our history, I figured Greg would be impervious to my poop-gas. He was, to a degree (he only mustered a few dry heaves and between gags coined the brand "Hugo Anuse" because I had earlier stolen a few sprays of his Hugo Boss cologne), but I don't think his mom was. I am pretty sure that I turned her white walls tan, or at least beige and am consequently banned from all Mexican food in Phoenix- even Chino Banditos fusion Chinese/Mexican restaurant (sweet and sour chicken quesadilla anyone?).

Anyway, later that night after I hosed myself down, we headed out to Scottsdale to meet up with a few of Greg's friends. We went to a nightclub that was extremely trendy and out of my comfort zone. There was a strict dress/no fart code. At about 1:30 or so, as the place was about to close I went to the men's room. My phone rang. It was Greg.

"Dude, Steve Nash is here, I just saw him walk by. Hurry and get out here."

At that moment I looked to my right and saw Steve Nash peeing two urinals down. I went to the sink and washed my hands for about triple the amount of time I normally would. The restroom attendant was extending paper towels closer and closer, enticing me to finish up, but I was onto him. I wasn't going to pass up my first ever celebrity encounter. When Steve finally approached, I offered this:

"Hey man, I am a Blazers fan, but I love your game."

He looked at me with his drunk eyes and said "Hey, thanks man. I really appreciate that."

And that was it. Kind of anti-climactic, I know, but hey, at least I got to keep my streak of talking about inappropriate bodily functions alive.

When we were leaving, Steve walked past us wearing shorts and black, low-cut Chuck Taylor's (two time MVPs don't need a dress code). He was with a woman who was not his wife, but he did not leave with her. Also, he isn't an inch over six feet tall. I say 5'11". The best part was that there was a nice Cadillac Escalade with a driver waiting and we thought for sure it was Nash's, but nope. He went directly to an ABC cab. In retrospect, maybe we should have offered him a ride, taken him through a drive-thru, taking him home to wake up Greg's dad so he could have said hi...

Back in the hotel room, I didn't even have a chance to find out if my old buddy Steve won the skills competition or not. We had a busy day ahead, and breakfast was upstairs waiting. As I mentioned before I had the Khmer breakfast of dried fish, dried egg and rice porridge. Thank goodness for the bland porridge because the fish and egg were very salty.

The first place we visited was Bakheng Mountain, the number one tourist spot for viewing Angkor Wat from a distance and sunset. We had seen pictures of all of the crowded tourists and it was a madhouse. Not our scene at all. We went in the morning and my number one goal was to ride an elephant up to the top. Unfortunately, there were no elephants to be seen at this particular time, so we hoofed it up on foot.

The temple at the top featured steep, narrow steps that you had to walk up sideways and was undergoing quite a bit of restoration. There was a pretty good view of Angkor Wat from the top, but it was a little hazy out.

 In this picture I think that I am flexing to try and make my arm bigger, but it only accentuates the fact that I have tiny forearms. Maybe it would help if I did some reverse grip curls...or if I didn't have narrow wrists like a girl. Also, you can see Angkor Wat in the background.

 Sadly, no elephant rides for the Boyds. Maybe another time.

Next we visited the Cambodia Landmine Museum. This project was started by a former child soldier of the Khmer Rouge whose job was to set landmines. He claims that he set thousands of land mines and hundreds of innocent victims were either killed or seriously maimed because of the work he was ordered to do. If he had refused, he would have been killed.

He later fled to Vietnam, joined their army and fought against the Khmer Rouge. He now spends his time deactivating the same land mines he planted and has created an orphanage to help the families of those who have lost loved ones to mines, or have been maimed themselves.

Some of the pictures in the museum are quite graphic, and it was a sobering experience to learn of the atrocities that took place in the country that we were growing fonder of by the day.

One of the more interesting facts we took back with us was just how heavily bombed Cambodia was during the Vietnam War. The Vietcong crossed the border into Cambodia as part of the Ho Chi Minh trail. The Khmer Rouge was able to use the U.S. bombings as a way to rally support.

 
We also learned that the U.S. has refused to sign an anti-landmine treaty that has been signed by over 150 countries because it does not offer a "Korean exception." Landmines are a critical component of our military strategy in South Korea.

In stark contrast to the Cambodia Landmine Museum is the Angkor Butterfly Center located just up the road, which we visited next. The goal of the center is to preserve the butterflies native to Cambodia. It was also created as community outreach to help develop the community. Locals farm these butterflies and sell the pupae to the Center.

I wanted to take pictures of every butterfly that landed, but they were pretty pesky, also Sami was hungry and wanted Mexican food. I thought back to my time in Phoenix, and hoped this time would work out a little better. We stopped back at the hotel before going out to eat, and the All-Star dunk contest was just starting. Perfect timing.


Coming in Part 6: Lake Tonle Sap