Charlotte is Born Part Two

While Sami was being examined, I was given a six or seven page form to fill out. Most of the questions were in broken English so some of them were quite funny. Questions like, "Do you have vagina bleeding?" and "How often is your contraction going?" I took a quick picture of one page. One of the questions asked was "Do you want me to induce labor?" to which we replied with an unequivocal penned "no." We were both bought in to the hypnobirthing method and had every intention of performing this birth without intervention.

Here is the document I was given. A little hard to read. My heart was probably racing when I took the picture.

We chose to use a private birthing room instead of the communal area that had about a half dozen beds sectioned off with ceiling to floor curtains. This cost 250k wan more, but we felt it was worth it to be alone. Not too long after we were settled, another intern examined Sami and informed us that she had not yet dilated at all. This was confusing as the first intern had said she was at 4cm. A nurse explained to us that the first intern was less experienced, and apologized for getting us excited. This became a common theme throughout the labor as she was examined by a new person every time, each with a different idea of what a centimeter was.

Here is the room we were placed in, and then later moved from, and then later moved back into for the delivery. Like the wallpaper?

By this point, it was past 1:30 in the morning and I was exhausted. While I fought to keep from dozing, Sami and our doula seemed to be running on boundless reserves of energy. They talked and fell into calming rituals with each irregular contraction. In hindsight, we both agree that Sami should have tried to get rest that first night, and indeed all of the next day. The problem was that Sami had a difficult time laying down during her contractions, which were at this point only registering a 2 to 3 on a 10 point pain scale and came only a few times every hour. I somehow slept on the narrow vinyl covered sofa which faced Sami's bed from 3 to 5 a.m. Our doula Stacey caught a few winks sitting in a chair and Sami laid awake all night.

So little progress was made the next day that, by the evening, they moved us out of the private room used exclusively for delivery, and into the room next door. Sami worked hard all day, no doubt motivated by the threat of an unwanted cesarean section which we believed would be enforced if she didn't deliver within 48 hours of her water breaking. We settled into a comforting routine of light touch massage and swaying to help cope with the contractions. At the time, Sami felt like the contractions were powerful enough to move the process along, but the numbers didn't change.

Sami found her comfort zone (especially the last day) swaying back and forth while holding onto the arms of a chair during contractions. Notice that she had to have an IV of antibiotics put in due to her water breaking.

 Sometime in the afternoon we were visited by a group of high school students who must have been touring the hospital as some sort of job shadow assignment. The head nurse (who was very sweet and quickly became the only person we completely trusted) asked for our permission to let them come in, and we obliged, being no strangers to stares these past two years. The head nurse explained a few things as the dumbstruck kids looked on. As they left, one of the students offered up a "congraturations" which brought chuckles from the others. I kicked myself for not taking a picture of the students. How many mothers have a group of adolescents stop by to gawk? Not many I suppose.

At one point I stepped out to get some fresh air. To be honest, I felt a little useless with Stacey in the room. She was great at comforting Sami, and talking her through the day. I have always been one who needs more quiet and privacy than most, so for a few minutes in the afternoon, I walked the streets outside the hospital and took pictures of the surrounding area. The hospital is located in Hannam, which is an old section of Seoul along the Han River. Although it is a popular spot for tourists and ex-pats, it still has a very foreign vibe, and I wanted to take as many pictures as I could to capture the sense of place where my first child was born. It was astonishing to me to think that it took me 26 years to get to one of the world's major cities, and yet, my daughter was going to be born into one of the 5 largest cities in the world. It is difficult to explain, but being from a town of 10,000 residents makes me look at situations a little differently. However, the surrounding neighborhood felt smaller, with two lane streets and back alleys where fruit and fish vendors set up shop.

Sami delivered on the third floor of this building and we have been going back here for check-ups.

Just a view down one of the side streets across from the hospital.

Soonchangyung Hospital

For breakfast and lunch I ate the same snacks I had packed the night before and now my tongue was raw and salty from the Costco cache. Sami was given a decent tray of hospital food. They asked her if she wanted Korean, or Western style. Her first impulse was to go Korean, but when she realized that she would only be given the miyakgook (seaweed soup) that pregnant Korean women feast on exclusively, she went for the Western. I didn't want to steal her food like I normally do, even though she said I should because she couldn't eat. Instead, I ventured out to a Korean restaurant up the street and ordered a bowl of kal-gook-su (knife cut noodles) for only 5k wan. The ajuma running the restaurant was asleep on the floor when I walked in at around 5 o'clock. I had to wake her up by tapping her on the shoulder and saying "shi-an-hamnida." She smiled, and happily served me my noodles with plenty of clams. I enjoyed the meal immensely and got a little sentimental thinking that this would be my last meal as a non-parent. Afterwards, I walked up to Paris Baguette and bought a patbingsu for the three of us to share. I thought that Stacey wouldn't like the frozen treat because I hadn't liked it the first time I tried it either. It has since grown on me and I find it refreshing on a hot summer day.

Of course I had to add the spicy pepper paste to it. Wouldn't you? I could eat noodles every day of my life and be happy.

At 6:30 or 7ish Sami had her last exam and the woman performing it notified us that the baby would not be coming tonight and that we should get some rest. We decided to let Stacey go home, and although it didn't cross our minds at the time, this decision probably saved us some money. Before she left I got a call from one of my co-workers who said that she wanted to come by. I wasn't really sure if we could accept visitors in the room, but before long she was at the door with my Vice-Principal and two other of my closest teacher friends. They brought us snacks including a green tea cake and my VP even gave us an envelope with 50k wan. Again, I wished I would have thought to take a picture of them at the door.

Finally, they moved us out of the delivery room and into the less urgent room, which had a tv. I flipped through the channels, but nothing was on. It was nice to have just Sami and me in the room. We were slightly discouraged that no progress was made, and very tired. The process of actually becoming parents felt a world away as we sat alone in the dark.